Pledge Drive.

Welcome back.  You know, we don't enjoy these pledge drives any more than you do.  We don't like breaking into our programs to "hassle" you.  And if there were another way for us to reach out to you, the National Public Radio listener, and get you to freely contribute to our cause, we would.  But we have no commercial support, and other than a few generous grants from some very worthwhile philanthropic groups, you, the listener are our chief means of continuing. 
We hate breaking into quality programming- things you're not going to find anywhere else on the dial- All Things Considered, Car Talk, and of course Prarie Home Companion.  Where else are you going to hear African Poetry, Asian Humor, and the Social Criticism of Hungarian Dissident Edmund Kun?  Certainly not further up the dial, friends.
Think about it: For the price of an X-Box 360, an I-Pod Nano or a round trip ticket to Miami you can make a statement that says, "I value having NPR in my community and am no longer willing to take advantage of her bounty free of charge."  For just 75 cents a day, every day including weekends for an entire year you can make a commitment.  You can stand up in front of the world and say I need more options than commercial radio, CDs, Audiobooks, MP3s, and Satellite Radio, Sirius, XM- I need NPR. I'm going to join at the 50 dollar level or the hundred dollar level or even the thousand dollar level.                                                   
or maybe you won't.  Maybe you just won't.   Maybe you'll just keep on digging in your nose or reading TV Guide.   Or playing with yourself in the bathtub with a convivial disregard for society as it crumbles around you.  Maybe you'll just choose to ignore this one miraculous and obvious grace in your otherwise blighted existence.  Maybe you'll do what apes do when they come into contact with the rare or the abstract or the beautiful.  You'll wedge your finger up your ass and smell it and move on to the next shiny thing that falls between you slightly crossing eyes, trusting your social betters to maintain your plasticine habitat. 
Well, they won't, dude.
So we've already lost.  We've lost and Zell Miller's won.  And Dick Cheney's won.  And Sam Walton's dead but he gets to win too because NPR is going belly up on your watch, son. 
What?  You going to turn me off now? 
You're going to put on a CD?
No, don't let me stop you.
Maybe you'll pass the next fifteen minutes with a brisk two-handed palm luge?  Take out your photo-shopped picture of Jessica Alba and turn on Silent Lucidity by Queensryche and rock out with your cock out.  Remember to take a long balls solo during the killer guitar part.

Seriously. 

Take your time.

Enjoy yourself.

Coming up after traffic, we'll have Terry Gross with Fresh Air.  Her guest today is Willie Nelson who's just written a new song about cowboys.  Also, Corey Flinthoff talks about his experience having experiences while talking.  So don't touch that dial.  But if you do, wipe your hand off.  This is National Public Radio.